Five Ridiculous Jurassic World Ideas That Might Actually Happen

With Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom being out in the cinemas for almost a month now, it’s a good time as any to discuss what’s next for the long running dinosaur franchise. Needless to say this article is going to have spoilers, so be warned.

No matter if you think Fallen Kingdom was good or not, we can probably all agree it was kind of out there, kind of nutty. Liberated from the narrative shackles of Michael Crichton’s universe of pseudo-science and suspense, ever since the original the movies have been slowly shifting into the realm of ridiculousness and all out spectacle with little regard for scientific basis or slow burn tension building. Especially the end of the latest cinema outing pretty much sets up the franchise for a whole lot of not-so-subtle dinosaur action for the years to come.

But let’s look what the possibilities are, keeping in mind that even if they sound outlandish, they are all being perfectly plausible in a universe were a giant raptor-hybrid climbs on the roof of a Gothic mansion and roars at the rolling thunder.

Movie Idea 1: Dawn of the Planet of the Dinosaurs (The Expected)

The most likely thing to happen, looking at the end of Fallen Kingdom, is a post-apocalyptic type of disaster movie. In Planet of Apes type of fashion we can probably prepare for dinosaurs taking over the world. Cities protecting their borders from raptor attacks with walls and curfews, adventurers and thrill seekers hiking into the jungle to hunt T-rex, nations threatening to attack each other with trained dinosaurs. It would be in line with the animal rights debate that tried to sneak its way into the last two films. Are we going to shoot those Pteranodons in Vegas or capture them and set them free in the Yellowstone? It could be a mildly interesting premise: not very creative or original, but it could work. There’s probably a YA-ish plot to be worked in here with a bunch of 19-year olds trying to join the ranks of an elite force of dinosaur wranglers that protect New York.

Movie Idea 2: Jurassic Park Origins (The Dream)

As a Jurassic Park fan from the early beginnings, the new direction the movies took has of course not my preference. I liked it when the action took place in an isolated location and the whole concept of a dinosaur island was shrouded in mystery. Long build ups before the biggest beasts showed up, more horror-esque approach instead of action, sign me up. The best way to bring that back would obviously be an origin story. Before the island was known to the rest of the world, when John Hammond was just immoral capitalist trying to cash in on advanced gene technology. Show us how the park was build: the cover ups, the scandals, the corporate espionage, the misty, dark jungle of Isla Nublar. The original novel still has plenty of unused scenes and characters to take inspiration from. Suspicious sightings in Costa Rica of escaped compsognathus, mysterious wounds on a builder flown in from a holiday resort off the coast. We can always dream.  

Movie Idea 3: Dinotopia (The Nightmare)

As I said, for me it is a process of acceptance to like the new movies for what they are and take the different course for granted. But as with everything, I have my limits. The breaking point would be a Dinotopia, Theodore Rex type of universe where dinosaurs and men coexist in a symbiotic relationship. It’s basically the ending of Fallen Kingdom, but instead of chaos and apocalypse, the dinosaurs would integrate in society like service animals. Think of raptors as police dogs, brachiosauruses aiding in construction and a NASCAR race with people riding triceratops. If that concept makes you cringe, we’re in the same boat and let’s pray together that this never happens.

Movie Idea 4: Victorian Alternative Universe (The Outsider)

If you ever read fanfiction, I don’t need to explain what this is. Probably even unlikelier than the Dinotopia idea, this would come down to spin-off or complete reimagining of the franchise. Or, perhaps as proto-proto-origin story. In any case, it would be so nutty and unlikely to be greenlit, that it would hit a level of ridiculousness that I would perhaps even enjoy. The foundation for the aesthetics of such a movie have already been laid down with Fallen Kingdom. A Victorian/gothic type mansion, underground laboratories and eccentric old scientists doing experiments while we hear the Castle Rumble stock sound in the background. Just move the action a hundred or hundred fifty years in the past: cobblestones, misty streets, Tesla coils and Victorian asylums. Jurassic Park as a dinosaur zoo on a remote island in Massachusetts or off the coast from Whitby, England. Cast iron fences, lighthouses in the rain and audiences of top hat wearing gentlemen gasping and applauding as the veil is pulled of the raptor cage at the World Fair.

Movie Idea 5: Jurassic Park Remake (The Boring)

It has been done to James Bond, Scarface and The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, it’s being considered with The Matrix. Remakes are a thing and even though it might bring a dirty taste in your mouth, this might actually happen in the next decade. Would it be a good idea? Probably not. Objectively judged, Jurassic Park is a flawed movie with glaring plot holes, absurd dialogues and by modern standards a huge diversity problem. But that’s also why it’s so memorable, unique and fun to analyse and scrutinise. Apart from that it also brought forth a number of actors that all reached cult status. What would the world be without Sam Neill, Jeff Goldblum, Wayne Knight, Laura Dern and Samuel Jackson? This might actually be an idea worse than the Theodore Rex thing. Let’s hope this never happens, or at least only happens when our generation has been eaten by dinosaurs.  

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